The theft of time

Theft Problem IMPORTANT MESSAGE:You've heard about people who have been abducted and hadtheir kidneys removed by black-market organ thieves.My thighs were stolen from me during the night a few yearsago. I went to sleep and woke up with someone else'sthighs. It was just that quick. The replacements had thetexture of cooked oatmeal. Whose thighs were these andwhat happened to mine? I spent the entire summer lookingfor my thighs. Finally, hurt and angry, I resignedmyself to living out my life in jeans. And then thethieves struck again.My butt was next. I knew it was the same gang, because they tookpains to match my new rear-end to the thighs they hadstuck me with earlier. But my new butt was attached atleast three inches lower than my original! I realizedI'd have to give up my jeans in favor of longskirts.Two years ago I realized my arms had been switched. One morning I wasfixing my hairand was horrified to see the flesh of my upper arm swingto and fro with the motion of the hairbrush. This wasreally getting scary - my body was being replaced onesection at a time. What could they do to menext?When my poor neck suddenly disappeared and was replaced with a turkey neck, Idecided to tell my story. Women of the world, wake upand smell the coffee! Those 'plastic' surgeons areusing REAL replacement body parts -stolen from you andme! The next time someone you know has something'lifted', look again - was it lifted from you?THIS IS NOT A HOAX. This is happening to women everywhere every night.WARN YOUR FRIENDS!P.S. Last year I thought some one had stolen my Boobs. I was lying in bedand they were gone! But when I jumped out of bed, I wasrelieved to see that they had just been hiding in myarmpits as I slept. Now I keep them hidden in mywaistband